I Don’t Even Like Salad… In Fact I’ll Have What You’re Having

17 Feb

So, I thought I’d take this time to speak up for the slim chicks… Better known as “skinny bitches”, thanks to the female comic/actor Mo’nique. In the general American society, slim is almost always what’s in. Beauty is supposedly in things like slim bodies, light skin, light eyes and straight or close to straight hair. I have a completely different take on all of it, but for now we’ll just talk about the slim bodies.

I am a slim chick, a slim goodie, a skinny bitch… I came by it naturally. In my family for every two sisters one is thick and one is slim. One gets boobs, the other gets booty. I have a sister that is 13 years my junior, has a bust size I couldn’t even reach during pregnancy and thick straight legs that go on for days. She towers over me but she would need my hips and behind to look proportioned. Standing next to each other people assume two things: I’m younger and I don’t eat. In fact people just assume I don’t eat in general. For some reason being a thin Black girl automatically means I’m weight conscious and therefore I eat very little.

Allow me to enlighten the masses. I eat! We eat! I like cakes, cookies, pies, chips and ice cream more than anybody I know. When my daughter and I go grocery shopping, Little Debbie snacks are a necessity, like bread, milk and eggs. And you know what else? I have my struggles, just like big girls.

I’ve heard big girls say they dread eating at a restaurant in front of people. Well, slim girls dread it too. Do you know how many big girls have said to me at dinner “oh, you probably just want a salad right?”. I don’t even like salad! I just reply by giving the waiter my order, “can I have your sampler appetizer? Yeah, the one that comes with the wings, fries, mozzarella sticks, onion rings and calamari? For my entree I’ll have the baked ziti parm with chicken cutlet. And can you bring the dessert menu back later? I might want an Oreo Delight… Girl, you want a wing when my appetizer comes?” Truth be told I’m also the one who always takes home a doggy bag, because its not easy to fit all of that food in a 5’2 112 pound package without spilling over. However the bottom line is I LOVE FOOD. + + + =
I would appreciate it if people would stop assuming that I and all the other 110 pound Black girls are starving ourselves to maintain that weight. We may be a minority, but slim girls who like to get it IN at a buffet DO exist.

Slim girls do not have it as easy as people assume. We have flaws and insecurities as well. When you big girls lay on your back in bed and worry about your boobs separating and laying next to you, think of the slim chick who looks down, then side to side and sees no boobs at all. When you’re putting out $65 for one supportive bra, I’m on the line behind you spending the same on one padded/push-up bra. If you weren’t spending so much time rolling your eyes at the slim chick while you’re purchasing your girdle, you might notice the booty-bop in her hand. When my best friend and I get dressed to go to the club, I help her squeeze into her clothes and she pins me into mine. (Slim girls don’t always look forward to getting laid after the club either… Pins and padding are a lot of work and they could kill the mood when it’s time to remove them )

In the subculture of Black America, little girls are taught to desire to have big breasts, big legs, big hips and a big behind because that’s what our men are attracted to. Its not a subliminal message either. If your size isn’t a double digit then you’re often referred to as being “shaped like a white girl.” Every woman in your family is preoccupied with “puttin some mean on them bones.” You look at your mother, aunts and grandma with their big, bold, beautiful bodies and you anticipate looking just like that when you grow up. But for some of us it never happens. Then you get out in the world and see bodies like your own in ads all over but everybody bigger than you hates your guts. Its sort of a vicious cycle

One problem we do not have as slim chicks, though, is bitterness. We are not bitter about being small. We are not bitter about people assuming we eat like birds or that we must be anorexic or bulimic. We are not angry at big girls for having more curves and cushion for the pushin… Most of us can accept the fact that we’re just different.
Unfortunately it appears to me that many big girls are bitter and angry at me because they’re a few sizes bigger than me. I’m sorry that I was not even born with a bone structure to carry more than 130 pounds at a time… Sue me! Most of us aren’t even aware of your size until you mention it. A coworker sat across from me once and downed a large hot coffee in record time, then said to me “it’s so hot in here… You’re not hot?” I said, “no.” And she said, “I’m just hot cuz I’m fat.” I said, “I think you’re hot because you just drank a large hot coffee.” And she said, “oh shit… I didn’t even think about that.” I was thinking, I know… You probably think I’m as preoccupied with your weight as you are. Not at all, sweetie. ☕ =

This is one of the things in life that makes me grateful for the friends I have. We are all different, shapes, sizes, and colors but when we all get together the question is “what are we eating?” Nobody shuns me for being one of the smallest. I can relax amongst them and enjoy my food without feeling like I have something to prove with every spoonful. I’m a junk food junkie, so my friends don’t worry about me coming from the buffet line with a salad… They worry that I’ve skipped appetizers and entrees altogether and found the devil’s food cake.

My point is, we are all different and everyone’s differences should be appreciated. I don’t believe bigger is better or that a slim body automatically equates to a nice body. I think as long as a woman is at a weight that’s healthy for her, then she’s beautiful.
I’m sure it’s more complicated than it sounds but if everyone did less comparing by America’s societal standards for beauty and accepted themselves as God intended them to be, then there would be a great deal less cases of anorexia, bulimia and obesity. Can I get a Amen??

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One Response to “I Don’t Even Like Salad… In Fact I’ll Have What You’re Having”

  1. Ms. Tee February 19, 2012 at 1:31 am #

    Coming from a certified “Thick Chick”….I totally get this blog from your point of view…and just how “Skinny Bitches” are stereo-typed as “non-eaters”….”Big Girls” are labeled as “overeaters” and that is soooooo not the case for me! I’m a picky eater…and I tend to eat more fatty, starchier foods(rice, pasta, cheese…potatoes) Good Lord!! Lol I bet I’m not the only one. We are all different for a reason…Let’s all be who we were meant to be!! Great blog Chica!!

    Like

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